Changes

So yesterday I found my bible and journal, both lost for at least six weeks. They were in a box in the basement. I found them just two days after I finally broke down and bought a new bible — a NASB.

Life is difficult and yet at times I question how I could think that. Not sure if I just like the pity or if my opinion on things is just always askew. Regardless, I've got a fair amount of work I could and should be doing, plus studying for a comp exam, updating my resume, creating a visual resume to do. I'm going to a conference in 10 days and I hope to get myself a job. After then, I'll be applying everywhere though sometimes I think I really don't want to move on.

Moving on means opportunity and new people, places, challenges, community. I'm okay with that but my prayer is that something would work out here. That I could find a job and hopefully a job where I get to be creative and really address issues, problems, challenges, adversity. I'm tired of inventing problems and trying to find solutions for them — and maybe those efforts will result in a business but as for right now, I've got to graduate and figure out how to make some coin.

Oh Lord, I need you and I want to be with you. I know you are near, I know you love me. Lord, please keep working on my heart and keep transforming it to be like yours, to be so desperately in love with you. Help me fall in love with your Word and in spending time with you. Help me to see your path for redemption in the people and the things that seem so fallen to me, the churches that seem so dysfunctional. Give me a hope and a desire to pray for your transformation of it all, to see your Glory come through the renovation and restoration of it all. Give me a heart of love and patience and grace for those who so annoy me, for those I would rather ignore, for those I'd rather defame, steal from, etc. Lord, get me a job here or in Ohio or the midwest — please! Help me know that you are near and that you won't leave me and have plans to prosper me.

Your son,
Eric